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Forgotten

Masroofiyat ka aaisa alam tha

Dosh kisko dehte

Shikayat kis se kurte,

Humeh kaam na purah

Aur woh humara naam bhi bhool gaye
-Shareen Shalz

Translation

Busy to such and extebd

with no one to blame

I had no reason to connect &

they forgot even my name

Like a River I flow…………….

I flow from my source

Raging through the mountains

Dancing against the rocks

Romancing with the beach

Jumping over boulders & blocks,

Swirling through the path,

Swaying in the plains

I keep flowing without complaints

Im often pushed from behind

Joined by many streams

Some become me and

they become mine,

Tied down in a canal

To irrigate my family

I’m still not rested

But I serve and am tested,

I hold many secrets

In my bed deep

They vent, they let go

It helps them sleep

Sometimes Held by a dam

Trying to control

But I free myself

flowing Towards my goal

Rain added into me

I gave away tributaries

I have eroded with time

And have abrasions and scars

On what I carry inside me

Remain within me and

Will always be

There were Rapids in my path

And meanders too

Some mocking parked boats

Some swimmers,some floats

Experiences many but

flow never slowed

There’s no stopping me

And I can’t stop

I will flow,

Be it boulders or be it rocks

I will find a way to the mouth

Where the river meets the ocean

I too will merge into the divine

Until then I go through my course

Unquestioned, unanswered

With faith I flow in the divine

Inspired by Ganga

In life and in rhyme

-Shereen Shalz

Tug-a-War

Short Story-The tug a War

It was a very special evening, I was going to propose to the love of my life, we had been together for 3 years now, what started out as a budding friendship turned into love in no time, we both felt the magnetic pull, there was chemistry, physical attraction and a perfect understanding. We could joke, laugh and smile all day long. My heart was filled with love and eyes had a sparkle and a smile on my face that became my new look. We both had had a rough past & painful relationships but we had talked about them and they were in our pasts now. We both initially were carrying a lot of fears, insecurity and baggage from our past relationships but with 3 years of being together that was now in the past. So, I went out and bought a ring and I wanted to do this differently and make it a memorable moment. Not the old cliche dinner and champagne nor the going down on my knee that was not us. I booked a cottage for us on the beach front and decided to take a small vacation together. I had decided to propose to her at sunset at the beach, it had taken a lot of time for me to overcome my past and now I was sure that she is the one, I felt a soul connect and I knew she was different and was not like the others, I now firmly believed she would not betray me nor hurt me and I was going to start a life together with her. We landed at the airport and took a scenic drive to the resort. The place was romantic and there was love in the air, I could breathe it. I asked her if she would like to go out for a walk to the beach around sunset after resting up a bit and she said sure. I still remember she wore this angelic white linen dress and let her hair down and there we were at the beach and the sun was setting. I held her hand and pulled out the ring from my pocket and said, “I know I pushed you away in the past and I know I’ve been a jerk, I know we’ve both had our fears, apprehensions and dilemmas, I know I put you through a tough tug a war with me and I may not be the easiest person to be with but you still love me and I have taken some time to come around but today and from this day forward I would like for us to spend the rest of our lives together, will you marry me?”

To my disbelief She instantly withdrew her hand & had tears rolling down her eyes. I didn’t understand this behaviour, this is not what I expected. I thought those tears would be tears of joy and she would say “Yes” I never imagined she would withdraw her hand and walk away from my proposal. All she said was “I love you but I can’t.” My male ego kicked in and I felt stupid & rejected.

We both returned to the room and there was this uncomfortable silence between us with neither of us attempting to break it. My best friend, my lover, my soulmate,the love of my life had instantly become a stranger. We had dinner and slept facing the other side that night.

The next morning she fixed me coffee and we sat out on the porch, with the sea breeze brushing through her hair, she said, “ it took you 3 years to realise that you love me and that I won’t betray you & hurt you whereas when I met you & you came in my life, I was broken and shattered inside, I had gotten out of a painful relationship too and had as many fears and apprehensions as you did, but my connect with you healed me and I had let go of my past and started living in my present with you and my love for you but when I reached out to you to express my love for you, you withdrew telling me that you weren’t ready, you had trust issues, you had fears, you had scars from the past and needed more time, do you remember that?”She asked. “There was no ring that day but it was my heart I was giving to you and you shut me out. I realised that day that if you were so unsure then obviously my love for you wasn’t good enough to erase your past, fill your wounds and take away your fears, I felt rejected and I pulled my guards up & from that day forward as much as I love you my fears of you hurting me magnified multiple fold.”

◦ She poured me some more coffee and kissed my forehead and said,”I know you probably feel the same way today but I haven’t refused you because you turned me down 2 years back, this is not a comeback at you. I do love you but now I have scars with you from being in this relationship, because every time in the last 3 years that I tried to reach out to you and express my love to you, you withdrew. It’s pain that I felt every time you compared us with your past, Every time you distanced because of your fears of getting hurt and losing control, they all played a toll on me making me realise my love couldn’t heal you instantly like yours had healed me only to give me fresh new wounds replacing the scars & In the midsts of the tug a war somewhere it snapped.”

I was listening to her and could actually relate to how she may have felt then when she had said she was in love with me and I had turned around and said “I’m not sure I am ready as I’m fearful of betrayal and my past still haunts me.” I replied to her, “You knew I’ve always loved you and will until my grave but I truly was unable to let go of my past memories and pain.” She said,”I understand but now I have fears of betrayal and fears of getting hurt in our present relationship because when I was pulling you close,you where pushing me away and in the tug a war it snapped. I have my guards up now and I’m not sure if I’m ready to commit with these fears.” I replied “ok let’s give it some more time.” To which she said “our egos & self dignity won’t permit that, rejection hurts even though there’s love between us the timing was off.”

We spend the next 2 days as friends and parted ways but I still carry love for her in my heart and have one more painful memory added that will continue to block me from living in my present.

Moral of the Story-it’s the timing, we can’t live in our pasts, if you feel love and care for someone don’t let your egos crawl in, don’t let the past memories take the present away from you, live in the moment, be sensitive to the others feelings, you may end up hurting and pushing them away to a point of no return and it may be too late when you realise that.

-Shereen Shalz

The last Valentines Day wish

PLEASE READ TILL THE END-Here’s a very deeprooted message for all of you from my personal experience-“ In a blink of an eye,everything can change.So forgive often & love with all your heart-You May never get that chance again.” Say I love to to the ones you love this V-Day, it’s not about candle lit dinners, expensive gifts, roses & parties, it’s the expression of the feeling that we hold inside, of love for the other. Set your egos & differences aside and rekindle that love, So I use to write poetry & still do some of you know & some don’t but I wrote something on Valentines Day 2016 for my husband Sunny from my heart and gave to him that I stumbled upon it right now and would like to share it because it’s so ironical that, just the year we talked about rekindling our lost love in Feb 2016, he was diagnosed with Stage 4 Cancer in June 2016 & this is life. Life’s unpredictable, don’t let it go by…….
Please read what I had written.

“As we age I cherish the past,two lovers grew, a family at last.


A date night followed by talks, love or lust,
Married in a wink,
next day schools and kids, waiting for the bus.

Kindergarten for kids went by fast,
dance, basketball, what a blast!
Our little baby is a teen,
where did the time go in between?

Date night, when was the last time?
work, bills, we were often left without a dime.
Working on budgets & stess grew with time,
Our kids were growing, graduation soon,
perhaps like a flower our lost love will bloom.

Our patience short, a sudden turn,
our love colliding, starting to burn.
Shouting, crying, regret once more,
have we forgotten our love,
will there be no more?

Back from a seed, a giant Willow Tree,
spreading the roots, a strong foundation, a family tree.
Thankful for much, God’s helping hand,
guiding us with his mighty plan.

Through the dark, two lovers rise,
the blinders are taken from our eyes.
Thankful for much, why couldn’t we see
the blessings abound, a beautiful family.

Laughing, dancing, date nights, talks,
Drives, kissing, moon-lit walks.
Through the trials and tribulations we did see,
that true love and family forever will be.


Happy Valentines Day
Hope we can rekindle our lost love some day before it’s too late & hold on to it forever and a day.
With blessings Always.”


-Shereen Shalz


Yes we sure rekindled our love and realised how deeprooted it was but destiny came with a deadline to show it.
Will love you forever my dear Sunna, wherever you are, you live on in my heart until we meet again. ❤️😍☹️ 😭

Roohani Rishtey

Soul connections

Hey man(मन) Mere,
Sun mera kehna,
Is baar nahi behna,
Aur Dard nahi sehna,

Lurna hai halat se,
Jusbaat se,
aapne aap se,
Din me bhi
aur is raat se

adhura sapna

Aapne akelepun meh bus
yeh yaad rukhna,
Mere man(मन)
dil Meh rukna bus
Ek ehsaas,
Ek khayal,
Ek bharosa,
Kohi apnaa

Ab is Ishq ki khudai ke khatir
aur mut kar lurahi
Is Roohani rishteh ki na leh aazmaish

-Shereen Shalz

Translation

Dear Heart,

listen to me,

You are not to flow no more

Not to endure any more pain

You have to fight

With your circunstances

Your emotions

With you self

Day and night

When In solitude

Just remember

Dear heart

Keep it in your heart

The feelings

The thoughts

The beliefs & faith

That someone yours

But incomplete dreams

Now for the sake of this divine relationship don’t fight anymore

Don’t put this soul connect to anymore tests

Silence-The unspoken language

Silence

An unspoken language

That can convey the truth

Or sometimes be misconstrued

It’s mysterious calm

Inquisitiveness in its own charm

Holding back or left stunned,

Not a word, just mum,

Explain this reticence,

Is it hesitance?

Is it reservation?

Or Is it restraint?

Is it shyness?

What’s the reason for this quietness?

There is so much calmness,

And tranquility in this numbness.

Are you that discreet or is it silence of deceit?

Thoughtful or watchful?

Prudent or Shrewd?

Give me something

Maybe an undertone or strum a hum,

We trained to analyse kinesics,

Read between lines,

With no words, no lines,

No lines, no rhymes,

No rhyme, no mimes…..

Just A secret that lies beneath,

You, your silence & your mind.

-Shareen Shalz

Jaan Nisaar

Tuhmne yaad kiya humko

Ehsaas heh mujhe

Kuch bin kahe hi

Bahut kuch keh gaye

Yeh kasoor na hoga tumhara

Agar tumne Ikrar na kiya

Yeh kasoor na hoga humaara

Agar humneh tumhen bhula diya

Woh Shyaamein thi rangeen

Sapneh saja gayi

Pur zalim zakhum hai puraana

Hakikut dikha gayi

Ab dur lughta hai un batoein se

Kutrateh hai mulakato se

Ab dur lughta hai un sapno se

Un shyaamo ki yaadoein se

Na juta payenge hum yeh himaat

Na itbaar hai,

na aaisi humaari kismaat,

Na kasoor hoga yeh tumhara

Agar tum woh shyaam bhool gaye

Na kasoor hoga woh humaara

Agar hum tumhara

naam bhool gaye

Kuch atit ka dard,

kuch dur ka alam,

Kuch unkahi bateein,

kuch rangeein yaddein,

kuch mulakatein

Yeh sab thoda thoda batoor kar

Hum ishq meh ho kar bhi

Bina doobeh, Paar ho gaye,

Bina kuch kaheh,

aap ke jaan nisaar ho gaye

~Shereen Shalz

Imtehan

Tarus Na kha hum pe,

Humari khudhi ka

na leh Imtehan

Kuch khuddaari reh neh do baaki

Aaisa Na ho keh meri bebaasi meri inteha bun jayee

Yeh sur jhuka tha sirf tere dur pe

Yeh haath utha tha dua Meh rab se

Aaj kyon ansooein se bharri hai ankhein kab se

Translation-

Don’t feel sorry or sympathetic towards me

Don’t test me as a being

Don’t put me through anymore tests

Atleast let me have my self dignity

Don’t make me feel so helpless that It reaches a limit

This head only bowed in your temple

These hands only raised in prayer

Why today these eyes are filled with tears for so long.

-Shereen Shalz

Jaan Nisaar

Tuhmne yaad kiya humko

Ehsaas heh mujhe

Kuch bin kahe hi

Bahut kuch keh gaye

Yeh kasoor na hoga tumhara

Agar tumne Ikrar na kiya

Yeh kasoor na hoga humaara

Agar humneh tumhen bhula diya

Woh Shyaamein thi rangeein

Sapneh saja gayi

Pur zalim zakhum hai puraana

Hakikut dikha gayi

Ab dur lughta hai un batoein se

Kutrateh hai mulakato se

Ab dur lughta hai un sapno se

Un shyaamo ki yaadoein se

Na juta payenge hum yeh himaat

Na itbaar hai,

na aaisi humaari kismaat,

Na kasoor hoga yeh tumhara

Agar tum woh shyaamein bhool gaye

Na kasoor hoga woh humaara

Agar hum tumhara naam bhool gaye

Kuch atit ka dard,

kuch dur ka alam,

Kuch unkahi bateein,

kuch rangeein yaddein,

kuch mulakatein

Yeh sab thoda thoda batoor kar

Hum ishq meh ho kar bhi

Bina doobeh,

Paar ho gaye,

Bina kuch kaheh,

aap ke jaan nisaar ho

~Shereen Shalz

Ishq-Divine Love for God

MUKHFI AWAAZ

(love is God & God is Love)

Ishq

Azzli muhabbat kar li humneh

Yeh Shama na ho payi kam

Badleh kitneh mausam

Kitneh tufaan aah kar gaye thum

Yeh tumahara Mushkilaat Say Bach Kar Aana

Aur mere dil pur aapne naqsh chor jana

Na kum hui yeh alhada,na ishq hua kum

Na ki hoti bepanaah muhabbat

Na Dast Bardaar Hoteh,

Na milti yeh Elahi, na deen daar hoteh

Is daimi ishq se sekha, Itaat Qubool Karna.

Is Bandegi ke sadqe,khudha ki ibadat qubool karna.

-Shereen Shalz

TranslationIn English

Ishq

Divine Love

I have experienced eternal, never ending love,

The fire never went out

Despite passing seasons, years, problems and issues.

Despite all obstacles everytime we were together you left a permanent mark on my heart.

Neither the fire nor the love burnt out.

If it was not for the endless, ceaseless love I would not have been able to surrender…

View original post 39 more words

Maidaan-e-Jung

MUKHFI AWAAZ

Ek Toofaan sambhaley bethe they hum,

Dariya ki Gheraiyon ki turrah,

Chupaiyeh huaeh they yeh ghum,

Dahung khub hum ne kura,

Rehnumae karnay me kasar chori na kum,

Fir bhi Doob gaya mera Hamdam,

Muqaddar ki laharon meh li roposhi,

Aur chor gaya ek zalzala,

Ab nahi hoti kum yeh bebasi,

Roj dastak dehti hai badqismati,

Aur Hum tayyar hokar,

utar te hai maidaan-e-Jung meh,

Larne kabhi taqdeer se,

Kabhi aapno se,

Kabhi apne naseeb se,

Kabhi apne aap se,

Kabhi Zaat se,

kabhi khuda se,

Thuk gaye hai hum ab aur na le imtehan,

Aaisa na ho toot jaye bharosa

Mit jaye sab Yakeen,

Hifazat kar, mehfooz Rakh,

Yehi meri Manajat,

Bus bahut huyi teri yeh Ibrat,

Meri Shrada aur Saburi ki,

Baba, Deh yeh Inayaat,

Jab thum jaye yeh toofan

Toh naseeb me ho jamaat

-Shareen Shalz

Translation-

I have hidden a storm inside of me,

Like the…

View original post 175 more words

Nisyan

MUKHFI AWAAZ

(Amnesia)

Mita de woh yaadein

Bhula de woh baatein

Ghiza de manhoosiyat,

Ata kar Roohaniyat

Hansega zamana,

kahega dewaana

Na janega ka kohi

Yeh moajaza tha Tera,

Yeh Kaffara tha mera.

Bus Rakhu Yaad tujhko

Itni iltija hai Mere Baba,

Jab Rubaru ho Mere Khuda Se,

Sir jhuka hua ho mera.

Bhula de, Mita de woh Mazi hai Mera

Ab Tu hi sukoon hai, tu muqaddar hai Mera.

Kabool hai yeh Hukum-e-nisyan Tera.

-Shereen Shalz

Translation-

Wipe off the memories

Make me Forget all the conversations

Dissolve All the bad luck,

Grant me soulfulness

The world may laugh & call me crazy,

No one will ever know,

That This was your miracle

And my self punishment.

Just want to Remember only ‘You‘

That Is my only request ‘My Lord’

That When I meet you face to face,

Just Ensure That my head is bowed down.

Make me forget & Erase…

View original post 26 more words

Eh Zindagi

MUKHFI AWAAZ

Eh Zindagi tujhse khafaa hu meh,

Is dil ki Gheraio meh khla hu meh,

Gila kareh kis se, tu apni Zat meh hai mazroof,

Tawajjo diya Nahi tumne, Zahir kiya nahi humne

Guzar jayega ye Doar, mukammal ho jayega yeh Esra

Pur tu na samjhegi humari chahat,

Aur hum rahenge teri tavaqqo se bohat kum

Tu rakh itminan, naa kar fikar

Ghair Mutmain hu meh

Preshan hu meh

Tadbeer de ya badal de taqdeer

Is hujoom meh bhi, tanha hu meh

Eh zindagi tujhse khafa hu meh.

-Shereen Shals

Translation

Dear Life, I’m upset & disappointed with you.

In the depth of my heart there’s emptiness, a void.

Who should I complain to, you are too busy into yourself.

You never paid attention and I never bothered to mention.

This season will pass & time will end too,

You won’t understand my desires

And I will never be able to…

View original post 40 more words

Lights Out

No colourful rangolis, nor lights,

Nor the desire to dress up,

Nor mithais to savour, no card fights,

No loud crackers nor Diya’s burning bright,

No vacation at exotic locations,

Loss of a loved one,

Not just mine but many across the entire nation,

Hollow hearts, tearing eyes reminiscing cremations,

Depressed elders in isolation,

This Diwali is different & rare,

One that will leave many families

Missing their lost ones, crying in despair,

There will be many homes with lights out today,

No reason to celebrate instead keep the crackers away,

You can’t take away their pain,

But be one as a nation

Joining with families for strength in prayer.

Make an endeavour as we’ve celebrated together,

Today across the globe there

Is pain, suffering & displeasure.

Pray for peace & humanity

Pray not for riches & gold,

But for health & sanity.

Written by Shereen Shalz

Miss you on karwachauth night

Aaj yeh chand 🌖 neh rula diya,

Teri yaad neh hur lumhah yaad karadiya,

Kon layega meri hur saal ki saree joh tum bhulte nahi theh

Kon uthaye ga mere nukreh

Tumhare dale hueh meri saas ki behrukhi pe pardeh,

Yeh chand ki aaj chandani bhi feeki hai,

Yeh dil roya aur ankhein bheegi hai,

Tum jahan bhi ko

Umeed hai Kai theek hogeh

Meri dil-e-dimaag me hameesha rahogeh

Kuch umeedeh aaj bhi baaki hai

Ansooyen meh kategi yeh raat, baatein bahut se baaki hai

Scars of the Past

He never knew & had never known,

The deep-rooted pain I had never shown,

The hidden shadows of fears from the past,

The thought left me anxious & aghast,

Life was never the same again,

A lesson learnt…to abstain,

From being true & vulnerable,

Underwent the pain of love in vain,

Took not months but years to succumb,

Chose a path that helped me overcome,

This horrible nightmare, burried, concealed glum,

Affected mentally & physically

Leaving behind scars & wounds,

Healing consumed me

& I forever doomed.

Insecurity & Unacceptance,

Unmet expectations & Rejection

Not easy to deal…..

From those you love selflessly,

Hurtful words said with so much each so senselessly

Your needs lying naked defencelessly,

Only leaving you shattered, tearing, helplessly,

No! You can never be the same again,

You will always remember the lessons learnt to Abstain,

Run from vulnerabilities

& fear the pain of love in vain,

And brings shivers from

The slightest sign of

Insecurity, unacceptance, neglect, rejection & past domains.

As crazy as it may sound, as insane,

This is just how our brain administers restraint,

He will never understand what I sustained & what remained.

Scars of the past, brain fog

& mental strain.

-Shereen Shalz

Dil-O-Dimaag

Mohabbat dil se ki jaati hai janab

Dimaag se toh sirf karobar chalaye jaate hai

jasbaat se rishtey nibhaye jaate hai

Sochna dimaag ka kaam hai 

Jazbaat mehsoos kiye jaate ha

Pur dil ke taiz ehsas ke samneh insaan beykas hai

-Shareen Shalz

Translation in English-

Love from your heart not your brain, my friend 

Use your brain to do business  & your emotions to mantain & sustain relations. 

It is the job of the brain to think 

Emotions are to be felt 

But when faced by intense feelings of the heart humans are helpless.

Unspoken Eyes

Eyes can speak

Look into those eyes,

they have stories to tell.

Without uttering a word,

they speak well.

Words maybe minced

& be said to gain acclaim,

Or to please you,

or amuse you ,

or to cheer you up

or to entertain.

But Eyes don’t lie,

they are virtuous & can be trusted,

Untold stories as is…….unadjusted.

Look deep

& you may touch ones soul,

read ones mind or catch feelings unfold.

You can gauge ones love in their eyes,

Without a teardrop hear their cries.

You can see the wrath

& their anger too,

Be it hatred or their envy for you.

Eyes of true love are always blind,

Because they connect you with the divine.

They evade the brain & have no heed,

No needs & no greed.

Eyes speak a language only few can perceive

Most look at your lips & listen while you speak.

Look in the eyes

& hear not with your ears,

Unravel the unspoken truths that lie in the hidden tears.

-Shereen Shalz

Faith Revalidated

I believed in Him,

I have felt His presence too,

I have acknowledged Him,

He created me & you.

But when I met Him

Face to face, I don’t know why?

I was mummed & I did cry,

Seeking Answers & forgiveness too,

He Answered saying,

“It was not you,

I designed it such,

it was meant to be,

You merely strolled the path

that led to me.

The path you humans call…

Destiny.

How else could I Revalidate

Your faith in Me.”

🙏Jai Sai Ram🙏

-Shereen Shalz

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